I started on 3x1mg/day Progynova (buccal) monotherapy last Saturday morning: 1mg every ~8 hours.
I’d known about HRT for probably a decade, conceptually, and started developing a real understanding of things (what to take, how to take it, effects, risks, what’s (ir)reversible, etc.) around 3 years ago. I passed it all off as academic curiosity at first, but last year realised I’d been looking into this (whether reading or just looking at timeline photos) almost daily for years at this point; and then I realised that I actually wanted to take it myself. Having done my research, I saw firstly how oddly easy it was to acquire the materials — I’d blindly assumed for so long that this was something only others could do, how was I ever to get access — and secondly that I could pretty much just stop if things weren’t going the way I’d intended, and testosterone would probably resume its dominance.
I approached this as an experiment above all, and to satisfy my curiosity: it had become clear to me that, if I reached old age without having tried something so easily acquired (even in a country now infamous for gatekeeping bodily autonomy) it would be a major regret; by contrast, I could not imagine myself regretting having developed breasts as part of an experiment, because why wouldn’t you want to know how it felt for the other half? I’ve always been an adventurous foodie, so adding one more pill made sense.
Within about 3 days my body odour had changed completely — I even went 3 days without showering just to disprove my suspicion that it was placebo. By the end of those 3 days I definitely had a “haze” of scent around me, but it wasn’t the sour, pungent testosterone-based odour I hated so much.
The nipple soreness, however, is giving me mixed feelings: I’m currently flipping between “Wow, this is actually working” and “This is worse than recovering from wisdom tooth extraction”. I hadn’t expected this to start so quickly, especially given all the posts I’d seen claiming that oral/buccal/sublingual wouldn’t work for monotherapy, and for external reasons this has me apprehensive: I am due to spend a number of weeks with old friends and family — across the world — in a few months who only know me as “a man with very long hair and shaped eyebrows and questionable fashion choices” and, depending on how quickly this most visible aspect of estrogen develops in me, I may have to consider pausing momentarily and/or finding some clothes to mask things.
The issue of breasts was actually my initial motivation: provided I can have small breasts (and I know this isn’t something you really get to choose) I think it would be a positive change to my look; I don’t think I’d enjoy anything that got in the way of my rather active lifestyle, nor would I want anything that I couldn’t (relatively) easily hide. But given that I’m not out (in any respect) to most people I know, this is also the scariest consequence of estrogen.
The lower libido is very welcome: I still feel a tingle when I see something I like, but without the automatic erection. This became the norm probably by day 3 or 4. It’s like I’ve gained more control over myself: I get to decide when I have the erection (by touching myself) rather than my body nagging me to do something. Maybe this is an element of that “calm”/“quiet” that some people report feeling.
Psychologically, the only change I’ve noticed is that it’s very slightly easier to tear up/cry, but this is something I’ve been working on over the last few years anyway, so it’s hard to attribute any amount of change to estrogen directly; and it would be almost impossible at this early stage to separate the chemical effects of estrogen from the emotional relief(?) of having started this exciting (and terrifying) journey after so many years of debate.
I am looking forward to seeing how my skin changes, and to these supposedly more intense orgasms.
As for the issue of muscle loss, my motivation for fitness is entirely functional: I want to be able to cycle long distances and at high speeds to get places; I lift weights to maintain overall health and to be able to do things like move furniture around and do renovations independently. I suppose it’s more front of mind now that I’ll have to apply myself more than ever to fitness: no more “I don’t feel like gym” days.
I was very fortunate to have been gifted a venous blood test about 2 weeks ago: a nice, accurate baseline to start from. I’ll be doing my first post-estrogen test in probably 2 months. It will be interesting to see to what extent my testosterone production has been suppressed, because at least based on the speed of these changes, my body seems to have been thirsty for estrogen.